4th Quest [Audio, early morning] [Dawntrail spoilers]

[bladeofnymeia]

[She's awake. Has been, since the weakest strains of dawn. But Firoza has not the energy or the desire to project any image of herself when she makes this post. She just wishes to speak to someone. Anyone. Even if no one deigns to respond.]

...So these months. The ones where new arrivals begin to appear. The hazy ones.

[A pause. A stifled sigh.]

They feel as dreams sometimes. Especially when whomever you met does not remain once the air clears. And...I am not opposed to dreams. Bittersweet though they might be. But it does make me wonder something.

[As much as Firoza is keeping her tone even, the emotion that seeps out is palpable. Heavy, tender sorrow. Longing and loneliness, and...a sparkling, defiant mote of hope.]

Do you think...a-and if this is personal to you, please, do not feel you have to respond. But could it be possible that the living are not the only ones who can find themselves here? That...that those who ought to have passed on, in one way or another, could still...appear?

[Just gripping those fuzzy memories of reuniting to her heart, bidding them not to escape. It would be too much.]

I ask only because...well. I adore you all, truthfully. Even if we have not been introduced properly. But I cannot ignore how sorely I miss so many from home. Both those who live, and those who do not. I just...even in a new form, I...I'd like to be a little selfish, and hope to see them again.

[She ends it there, but not without a definite sense of being torn by this desire. Both an insistent palm pressed to a deep bruise, and a gnawing worry tinged with gold.

"Am I as they were? So desperate to preserve their dead, allowing them no rest, no renewal? Stagnant and ever present in a dream?"

The thought doesn't mean to come out, but it does. Oh, it does.]

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audio

[telewarped]

Well... Yeah. I don't just think it's possible—I know it is. I mean... I'm not supposed to still be around either, remember?

[It was one of the first things she and Firoza talked about when they met, back when Shoka was still adjusting to being solid and visible to the living again.]

... It's not a bad thing. To miss them.

[bladeofnymeia]

...Right. Apologies.

[She's silent for a good moment.]

I think...even if it was some kind of dream or trick...seeing them again definitely...mm. Unmoored me.

[It's the best description she can think of, this complete break and shift from the life she had been living here, and the life she now faces.]

...'Tis cruel, to have them for so short a time, and then they leave. But...ugh.

[telewarped]

Yeah. I get it. It... really sucks.

... Who was it? If you don't mind me asking.

[bladeofnymeia]

Ardbert Hylfist and Haurchefant Greystone.

[It hurts to say their names, but saying them also makes the memories feel more real. Still fuzzy, but real.]

Ardbert is...sort of always with me anyway, but. It's different to actually speak to someone in person again. And Haurchefant...ah, gods.

[A lot of heavy sadness in that "Ah, gods".]

[telewarped]

Two of 'em, huh? Geez. [Doubly rough.] What... kind of Pokémon were they?

[Maybe... talking about them a little will help?]

[bladeofnymeia]

Ardbert was some kind of bird. With a leek? A very large leek. The serious sort of set to his face was...very fitting. And Haurchefant was some kind of unicorn foal, which was appropriate - his house had a unicorn on its heraldry. That mane of his was like fairy floss...

[She's still not sending images, but Shoka gets the sense of like...a smile. A small, fond, tender smile, to think back on it. With a lot of warmth.]

I only knew them by their voices, but even in new bodies, it was still them.

[telewarped]

A leek? [Shoka starts to laugh—and then stops, because this actually rings a bell for her.] Wait—I think I met Ardbert! He was some kinda duck, right?

[It really does feel like a dream to her, too, but she remembers distinctly thinking that old proverb to herself. A duck comes bearing spring onions...]

He... seemed like a good guy. [A chuckle escapes her.] Maybe too good... I messed with him a little. Sorry.

[bladeofnymeia]

You messed with him? I'm confused.

[Oh no Shoka what'd you do]

[telewarped]

Well... He asked me what the giant leek was for. And I... might have told him we were gonna cook him with it...?

[bladeofnymeia]

...Why would we do that?

[She's not even mad, she's just genuinely confused, it's funny]

[telewarped]

I mean, it was a joke, obviously. So we wouldn't actually do that... But duck with leeks is a classic pairing. I mean, we even have an expression about it where I'm from. "A duck comes carrying a green onion on its back".

This place has a sick sense of humor sometimes...

[And so does Shoka, apparently.]

[bladeofnymeia]

Ooh.

[A pause of thought.]

Now that you mention it, I may have had leek with duck before...

[She gets the joke now!!]

[telewarped]

See? It's kind of a thing. Anyway, I think Ardbert... might've actually believed me when I said that...

[It was funny! But the knowledge that he was Firoza's beloved, deceased friend makes her feel a little bad about it now. She probably shouldn't have brought this up at all, actually.]

[bladeofnymeia]

[You can almost feel the sheepish smile that comes along with Firoza's laugh at that, gentle as anything.]

He's from a different world than I - the same sayings might not apply! Or he may never have reached a culture equivalent to the one where I got to try duck with leeks. [Thank you, Fantasy Japan, for giving Firoza lots of excuses to know pseudo-Asian stuff.] His adventures were primarily in his homeland of Norvrandt. And after a point, that was the only place anyone who remained could be.

[telewarped]

That explains why he mentioned Amaro, too...

[The creature's inclusion in FanGO was still recent when Shoka was last in Shibuya.]

... Anyway, Roza. Speaking as someone not living who also wound up here... I don't think Aardbert and Haurchefant would blame you for wanting to see them again. I bet they were just happy to get another chance to see you, too.

[bladeofnymeia]

...

[A soft hum.]

I suppose I know that. Deep down. But...to hear it confirmed, it makes it real, somehow. Even if it all felt like a dream.